North County LGBTQ Resource Center Opens, Attracts Military Volunteers

For nearly three months since the repeal of the military's "don't ask, don't tell" policy, Ashley Cardona has been able to serve openly as a gay Marine.

But with no official resources on Camp Pendleton as of yet, the corporal turned to the North County LGBTQ Resource Center at 510 North Coast Highway in Oceanside, to volunteer and help other Marines and sailors and bring a little visibility gay and lesbian service members.

“Hopefully I can get something started for future service members, some sort of group,” she said. “It’s got to start somewhere. It’s not going to start itself.”

Ashley often volunteers throughout the community and feels the center was opened at “the perfect time and the perfect place.”

“It’s a place for people to come together. We don’t have anything like that for LGBT service members,” she said adding that she hopes to see increasing resources on base.

The center is a five-minute drive from the base’s main gate.

Cardona, and her friend Erica Tragesser, a naval petty officer on base, volunteer at the center and are looking forward to help fellow service members.

“We’re excited to be a part of their team and we’re hoping to spread the word about myths to any other service members that we know and get more visibility on it and see how much more support we can get,” she said. ‘This is a great asset to the community.”

In addition to the satisfaction of helping others, the two expect to be able to use their service hours towards the Military Outstanding Volunteer Service Medal.

While Gen. James F. Amos, commandant of the Marine Corps, originally opposed lifting the ban on openly gay service members, he told the Associated Press last week that the “don’t ask, don’t tell” repeal was “a non-event.”

He added that his wife was happy to meet an openly gay couple at the Marine Corps ball in November.

The smooth transition following repeal of the policy contrasts sharply with a period when a gay service member could be stigmatized, harassed and possibly harmed.

In 2009, August Provost, 29, an openly gay sailor, was killed and his body found in a guard shack on base. A petty officer, Jonathan Campos, was charged in the murder, but he later killed himself in the brig.

Gay activists called for an investigation into whether Provost's death was tied to his sexual orientation, the San Diego Union-Tribune reported. The Navy told the paper that there was no evidence of a hate crime.

Officials hope the LGBT center will be a place for military members to meet people, relax and find the resources they need to feel comfortable with their sexuality.

When he addressed Sunday’s crowd, volunteer Tom DiCioccio joked that the center was the “first unofficial gay USO.” He turned serious, however, when, out of his pocket, he pulled out a 35-year-old hospital wristband he was given after a suicide attempt.

He said he tried to kill himself because he felt alone. While most military suicides have been tied to combat trauma, DiCioccio said some were likely committed by gay service members with no place to turn.

Tragesser, who has been stationed at Camp Pendleton for two years, said Marines and sailors reached out to her for advice.

“Guys come by and tell me that they’re gay and there’s nowhere else to go,” she said. “A lot of these guys are 18 years old…it’s got to be rough.”

When asked what kind of support she’d like to see in the coming months, Cardona said there should be more support groups, counseling services, and others should take into account that there is a unique aspect that gay and lesbian service members bring to the table. A link to resources for services for gay Marines and sailors on Camp Pendleton’s home page, would also be a great addition, she added.

One benefit gay service members now have, she said, is that they can talk to chaplains without fear of retribution.

While the Oceanside center will provide services for its military members, it is also a resource for all of North County, which has more than 700,000 residents, said Max Disposti, executive director of the North County LGBTQ Coalition.

The center plans to host various programs, such as support groups, HIV testing and yoga. It will also have a youth center and feature paintings from local artists.

Requests for use of the 1,000-square-foot facility have been steady, Disposti said.

“We’re going to outgrow this spot, and very quickly,” he said.

Related: Servicemembers United, a gay service member organization, is collecting donations for deployed and injured service members .

EDITOR'S NOTE: Because of an editor’s mistake, Ashley Cardona’s rank was incorrect in a previous version of this article. She is a corporal. Patch regrets the error. Comments from her and Erica Tragesser were clarified and are reflected in this version. 

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